The Real Life of a Ranch Hand's Wife

How quickly things change...

    I know that back to back posts are a little rare for me, but I promised. The interview went very well. Melissa made me feel "right at home". I was a little worried when she broke out the recorder, but it wasn't bad at all. After she left, of course I thought of 50,000 things I should have said. Things about why I actually started this here blog, to tell the ranching life story. Or I should have told her that everyone needs to get the word out about agriculture. Maybe I did say those things. I guess if I did, they're "on tape". My only concern was that I was a good enough voice for the ranching community.

    So after the interview, I was still sitting on my high horse a little bit. After all, it's not everyday that someone wants interviews you, right? Well, I was brought back down to earth by a bellowing cow. How quickly things change.

   Later that afternoon we could tell that a storm was rolling over the mountains, so we went to tag calves. The coming storm had dropped 7 new calves throughout the day. The Cowboy said, "Better tag them now before it gets too cold." If a calf's ear gets too cold, the ear will swell. If you tag them with a swollen ear, it can cause damage to the ear, they usually bleed a bunch, and after all that, the tag usually falls out. So it's no good all around.

    Usually the Cowboy does the tagging by himself, but when there's a few of them, then I help. The first one wasn't that bad, momma was a little up tight, but nothing major. Then as we were walking away, I heard feet. Fast, heavy, big running cow feet. Luckily for us, she stopped to smell the calf (that wasn't hers, because she hasn't even popped yet). The Cowboy insisted she was just playing, I insisted she was psycho. 

    A couple pairs later, there was a mean momma. Lucky for me, this whole time I'd been packing a base ball bat. I couldn't find a sorting stick, it was left in the other truck. The cowboy has learned that I don't step foot around mommas when they have babies on the ground without an equalizer of some sorts. If I can't find anything around, you can expect my pockets are full of rocks. 

    So anyway, the point is this....there's nothing like a snot-blowing, bellowing momma in your face. If that won't jerk you back to reality, I don't know what will. How quickly things change. Momma got a little close to my Cowboy, so I tapped her on the head. She took a step back and the Cowboy finished. I've learned not to swing unless a cow is literally stomping on someone. She's just being a good momma, can't fault her for that. 

    Speaking of mommas and babies.... 

    My munchkin recently hit a milestone. Yesterday I laid her down for a nap, only to have her come running down the hall 5 minutes later. I knew this was coming, she is almost 3, but I still was hoping that she'd never find a way out of her crib. I just wasn't ready for her to be in a big girl bed yet. I'm sure all the mommas out there know what I'm talking about. If she was still in her crib, she was still my little baby. Well, not anymore. After she finally went to sleep, and then woke up, here she came again. It was hard to not laugh as she came running down the hall, so proud, squealing and laughing and shouting, "See Momma?". How quickly things change....

 

Holy Nerves Batman...

    So here I am, blogging to all of you, instead of doing my hair or putting on makeup. I have a lady coming today to do an interview for one of the papers. Now I've done guest blogs, and newspapers before but those were all through email. I never had to try to NOT see how many ways to put my foot in my mouth. I've always said, I'm much better on "paper", or in this case computer screen. Word form I think is the point I'm going for.

    Anywhoooo, my main worry is not only making an idiot of myself, but also ranch wives everywhere. I'm already one step behind most ranch wives, as I don't have coffee cake out, or something wicked yummy baking away. So I guess you'll get to hear all about it, you know the "off the record" version.

    The only other problem is I don't know if it's nerves or the cabbage burgers from yesterday that is giving my kitchen a pleasant aroma. Those were the good luck words from the Cowboy this morning as he walked out the door, "Hope those cabbage burgers show up the same time the interview starts." Thanks hunny, love you too. I hope 160 calved last night and he tags the baby this morning and she eats his lunch, like she tried to do mine! Ok maybe not, he could actually get hurt that way. Come to think of it, cabbage gas is just about as deadly as a new momma cow!

    Here's how I woke up looking....

 

Looking again...

    At the end of 2010 I posted Looking Back, it was a type of New Year's Resolution only without the terrible cliche. So I thought in light of me totally spacing out my 1 year anniversary of blogging, I'd check in my progress on my list of things to do for 2011.

  Write a book--nope, not yet. =)

  Misplace my fat ass--starting to wonder where it is, but haven't completely forgotten where I put it. =)

  Get my Eggo Preggo--nothing good to report there (too busy calving, HA!)

  Find a replacement horse--actually tried one out the other day, now just need to find $$ to maybe get serious about it. =)

  Go to Christina Lake--it's still covered in snow, so...no. =)

  Get my Pictures up in a Gallery--well kinda. Not an actual gallery you walk into, but one none the less. I've launched another page, that's just for my pictures. www.theranchwifephotography.com So go check it out, let me know what you think, and be sure to look for new ones. It seems like horses have been the theme as of late, so there's a bunch in that gallery. =)

Thanks for stopping by! Sorry it's so short, I'm short on time these days with calving and all. =)

A Bad Day

    "You can't save them all", I was told as tears welled up in my eyes. The Cowboy couldn't even see me, but he knew I was about to cry over the calf that lay dead on the barn floor. "We did our best to help her, that's all anyone can ask." It was true, we did do everything, it's still heart-breaking.

    The Cowboy called me and told me to get everything ready, we were going to pull "that" heifer. 226 I knew who "that" was. We'd been watching her for several days now. I was relieved that the call was coming in the day and not 3am. I rounded up all the gear and the munchkin and we were soon out the door and headed for the barn.

    The Cowboy and I have pulled too many calves to count and too many heifers to remember. A lack of a "heifer bull" (a smaller bull or a bull that sires lower birth-weight calves for first time mommas) was the problem way back when. Mother nature was the problem with this one. She looked like an alright heifer, not too tiny, not to small of hips, just an average heifer.

    We had her in the head-catch in no time and went to work on pulling the calf. She wasn't pushing at first, but with a little encouragement, started to help a little. It was soon clear that there wasn't any progress made. We then went "fishing", in other words, we went in to feel the position of the calf. My smaller hands were no help this time as my arms weren't long enough. By this time, the Boss Man had arrived. He too went fishing and could barely touch the head.

    The calf had a head turned back. This means that the usual front feet first with head in the middle, didn't apply. The front feet were pointed out (with a bit of a twist) and the head was pointing towards the groundand up and over his shoulder. It didn't help that every time someone had a hand on calf's head to get it straightened out, the calf would pull back. It was a mess on every level you could imagine.

    Once we finally got the calf straightened out, the momma laid down while we were pulling. So we started pulling from the ground. She was too small. Boss Man had to do the bovine equivalent of an episiotomy, he had to cut to make room for the calf. Finally, finally we got the calf out.

    Momma just laid there, not really knowing what just happened. Calf just laid there, never knowing what just happened. The heifer calf never took a breath. Momma still laid there, relieved of her burden and pain, not wanting to get up. She was a good Momma, she never bellowed, never tried to fight us, never freaked out like some heifers do, it just wasn't meant to be.

    Losing a calf is never easy, but losing one that you've tried so hard to save is worse. When you step out of a barn covered in baby goo and blood and there's a live calf on the ground, it's a great day and worth a high-five. When you step out of a barn covered in baby goo and too much blood, to see the clouds have rolled in and it's raining, and knowing there's a dead calf, it just makes you want to cry. And I did.

    To all those people out there that think ranchers and farmers are mindless and we don't care about our animals because we raise them for meat.......I'll show you a grown man that sucks gunk out of a calf's nose to try to clear his airways, I'll show you a tough Cowboy that tries CPR on a dead calf to try to get them to breath, and I'll show you buckets of tears shed for the lose of animals from a ranch wife.......and that was just yesterday.

Good & Naughty Cows

It's been a while since I've posted, so there's much updating to be done.

    First things first, the trade show (first weekend in March) went over wonderfully! I had the wonderful opportunity to meet several people from the community that not only were "friends" on facebook, but readers of this here blog. =) I also had the chance to talk with several people about Double D Beef, answering questions and sharing information and such. It was great to know that there's such an interest in getting back to wholesome foods and supporting local agriculture. The only part I didn't like was having to leave the munchkin. She was in her Daddy's capapable hands (even if they did eat pizza the whole time) but I still had to deal with the "Mommy don't go" and "Momma feed cows, no go work". My hats are off to the working mommas out there that have to leave their little ones behind. I've always counted myself lucky that I either don't leave, or take my little one with me. I'm blessed.

I was right next to my friend Pure Fusion, so she snapped some pics for me. My booth won the "best booth" award, wahoo! With the great help of another friend Skye who shared the space with me. =)



 
Ok so this was at the end of the show, and we were a little bored.....

    Next on the list of happenings around here is calving. The sheep are done and have been moved to their more new homes where they can graze during the warmer weather and whenever summer gets here. The cows were rolling right along but have now stalled out a bit. They'll get back at 'er when the next spring storm shows up! We did however get the usual dose of scour guard in them and sorted out the 1st calf-heifers. (Scours is a deadly disease that affects calves after they are born. The idea is to catch them a couple weeks before they're born to build up anti-bodies against it with momma's help. If the calf gets scours it's like the worst possible flu you can imagine for an infant.)

    We also have been sorting heavies off (mommas that are about to pop) to keep them closer to the barn in case of problems. Well while sorting, there was a snorty red cow that wanted to blow a little snot in my back pocket. The Cowboy and Boss Man might have laughed a little more than I would have liked when I screamed like a little girl and headed for the fence. The problem was the melting snow made a huge puddle in the one end of the corrals that we were sorting in. Guess who was in ankle deep mud while trying to run from a mean cow? Yup, me, as is par for the course. All was ok though, she really didn't want to eat me that bad or else she would have had me for lunch!

    It was worth the trouble for that sort in particular. It was three days later that first thing in the morning there was a cow in trouble. She was wilder than bull snot. She ran at least 2 people through the fence and even ripped the Cowboy's pants a bit. She was a Naughty Naughty cow. We finally got her in the "calf pulling" pen safely and went to work. The Boss Man and Cowboy jumped in and pulled the giant heifer calf. She was huge! All ended well though, even if the momma was still head-butting the fence when no one was any where near her.

    Later that day, we headed out for another check before it was dark. The pulled calf was up and moving with no ill effects from the trauma earlier in the day. There had been a new addition to the nursery when I saw it. Another momma had popped, but still had a bag of water hanging out. She wasn't pushing or even trying. Toes, I could see toes through the bag which only means one thing....twins! =) This momma was nothing like the one we'd pulled earlier in the day. She was the kind you want to keep around. Easy to handle, good momma, and just a nice personality.

    The Cowboy and I got her in to the "pulling" pen with no problems. When we started to pull, then momma helped and started pushing again. In no time at all, there was a second heifer calf on the ground. So far so good. She's taking both of them and being a great momma.

    The only other bit of news is kinda big actually. I've been in touch with a wonderful ranch wife that is starting up a Wyoming chapter of the American Agri-Women. I can't believe that Wyoming doesn't have a program like this already! So long story short, I'm helping her get this off the ground and it's going to be great! Any time you can raise awareness about agriculture and the people involved it's always great! So far we only have a Facebook page till we can raise some funds for a website. So if you're on Facebook come see us and be a part, even if you're not in Wyoming! ( go here)

Till the next time, try to stay out of the mud while sorting crazy cows!

 

The Wagon

    You can learn many things from the back of a hay wagon. I've learned so many things over the years. I've also thought about many things while pitching hay to cows. I even wrote a song (that no one will ever hear) and now I write blog posts in my head to share with you later.

    I think more people should feed cows with square bales. Not the little ones, that's just crazy talk. Trust me I know all about feeding 10 tons per day of small squares for a month straight. The feeding isn't the tough part, it's the loading and the miles and miles of baling twine you have to deal with. Although, now that I think about it, I lost some weight and had some pretty nice guns (biceps in case you were wondering). Maybe it wasn't so bad.......

    As I've said before, on my first ranch experience, I pitched hay while the Cowboy drove. I was too afraid of getting the tractor stuck or going the wrong way where there wasn't a crossing. Besides, I had coffee to drink and cigarettes to smoke, I couldn't be bothered with driving. So I rode on the back, sitting on the hay, surrounded by dogs and had the view of a lifetime. I got to know "my" cows, and then eventually their calves from the back of the wagon.

    I talk to myself constantly while I'm feeding. I'm terrible. Even when there's people around to talk to, I still catch myself talking to myself. I solve the world's problems on a hay wagon. Most recently I was going through a checklist in my head of things that needed to be done before this weekend's trade show. Which pictures to take, what new ones needed to be matted, and names for some of them to keep them all straight. 

    The newest development that has happened involving a hay wagon is this, my 2 year old. She loves to drive. She puts her blue bear (that she goes no where without, they're BFF's for sure) either on the dash---so he can "watch cows Momma" or under her arm---so "blue drive Momma". She takes her job very seriously too, well most of the time. When she's not playing in the front seat or turning on the radio, she does a very good old lady farmer drive. You know creeping along, one arm out the window, little hands on a giant steering wheel, and sitting on her feet so she can see out the window. When you yell for her to start turning, you never know which way she's going to go, but afterwards she does ask, "Good Daddy? Good Momma?"

    Another new for me is actually talking to another person. Since we now have a trained professional behind the wheel, both the Cowboy and I can be pitching hay. Like I said, it's hard to break old habits and actually talk to a person. It is nice though.

    Here are some of the more important things I've learned.....

 1) When the wagon is empty, just stay on the wagon. You have to close the gates anyway. It's too much effort to climb all the way back in the truck or tractor. Save your energy. Remember, it's still early.

 2)When you ride on an empty wagon, sit to the front. There's a minefield of fozen cow turds out there and if you hit them while sitting on the back, you'll get ejected. Trust me on this one, live and learn.

 3)If you're the one driving. Don't try to be helpful. Don't stop and start 50,000 times just because a flake of hay didn't hit the ground. Just drive. Try to avoid the minefields. That's all I ask of you.

 4)If there's a missing board on the hay wagon that you've been stepping around all winter because you know it's there, don't assume anyone else knows it's there. While this does make for a good laugh for you, it doesn't always translate well to the other person. So tell them ahead of time. In my case, it was my dear Cowboy (that didn't listen to me when I told him about it in the first place, so I did laugh.....very loudly for a long time).

 5)Don't worry if it takes you a while, eventually you'll get your "wagon" legs. You'll start off looking like a toddler that can't stay upright, but have no fear, you'll get there. Soon you'll be jumping around that hay like a barn cat, all while the wagon is moving. Only when your husband stomps on the breaks and then yells, "oops, sorry" will you be thrown off the wagon. It's ok though, because then you're already on the ground and you can get to the truck door faster before he locks it for fear of his life.

 6)When you're sitting on top of a few tons of hay while it lumbers along, just breath. Listen to the crunch of the snow, the creaks and squeaks of the wagon, and the livestock as they come to greet you. Watch the hawk soaring high above you, the calves jump and play at the back of the herd, and the sway of the wagon that ambles along like an eight month pregnant woman. Remember all these wonderful things.......because at some point it will be below zero and snow sideways. Something has to get you through!