The Real Life of a Ranch Hand's Wife

Poor Chickens

    "Poor Chickens", my 3 year old munchkin said looking down at the freshly butchered chicken. The Cowboy and I were divided on how to introduce our daughter to the "life and death" part of ranching. If you remember, one of my first memories (at about the same age as her), was of a headless chicken chasing me down the driveway. I was of a mind of, "go play somewhere else". He was of the mind of, "she needs to learn where our food comes from". He was right and I knew it, so she stayed.

    It wasn't as nearly as bad as I thought it would be. Having said that, I must admit, I wasn't doing all the dirty work either. We only butchered 2 as a "trial run" kind of thing. The Cowboy must have felt bad for my ignorance, and actually helped me a bunch. Much more than he first said he would. After a "wring" of the neck, there wasn't even any flopping or running or anything. In my daughter's words, "swing 'em like a rope (swish swish)".

    At this point the munchkin wasn't too concerned anymore and went back to riding her bike. The now headless chickens were hung up to bleed out while the water finished heating up.  After the Cowboy dunked the first one, we hung it back up and I was off and plucking. Repeatedly I was told to take off my bright yellow rubber kitchen gloves and construction dust mask, but I wouldn't have any of it. Admittedly, it did take me longer to pluck a chicken than it did the Cowboy, but I'll chalk that up to inexperience, not the gloves.

   During the plucking, the munchkin got curious again and came to investigate. She inspected the chicken and stated, "Chicken has an owie, him have no head." She then went back to playing with baby kitties and feeding the rest of the chickens.

    We had a box full of feathers and heads, now we had to gut them. When I say "we", I mean that I helped hold the chicken to make it easier for the Cowboy to gut. Again, the child was curious and watched with a wrinkled nose. I'm quite proud of myself for not gagging until the second one was in the de-gutting process. Guess what got me? The mixture of the hot gut smell and of course the kicker was the suction noise (it didn't happen with the first one). I didn't let go though, I gagged and held the chicken at the same time. That's dedication! hahaha

   I carried the chickens into the house to wash, weigh and wrap. We kept one for ourselves, and the bigger one went into the freezer to sell. They weighed in at 3.75lbs and 4.25lbs.  A little lighter than I thought they'd be, but still a good weight.

    A couple days later, I made chicken and noodles with our home raised chicken. The munchkin watched as I prepared and put it in the pot to boil. She was asking about the dead chicken, so I tried to explain that sometimes we kill chickens so we have food to eat, just like the chickens kill grasshoppers so they can eat. She left and went to play. I heard her playing with a box and overheard her talking to herself. "Here's a box for the chicken heads, chicken feet, chicken fedders (feathers), and chicken guts. Now frow it away and eat da chicken."

    The Cowboy was right all along (hopefully he won't read this post with all these good words about him, and me admitting that he was right so many times!). Kids take things much better than we give them credit for. Sometimes I forget how black and white their world is. She knows to be nice to the chickens (and all animals for that matter) while they're here and how to care for them. She also knows that chickens need to eat grasshoppers to live, and we eat chickens to live. I'd say that's a pretty good grasp on life in general for a 3 year old.

    I'm sure this weekend might have a few more headless chickens in sight. 2 down, 18 to go! As long as the Cowboy helps like he did, I think I'll survive! 

The Latest Around Here

    Rain. It's all the rage these days. We're already at risk for flooding and the snow-pack hasn't even melted. We need the moisture as always, but it would be nice to see the sun every once in a while. I could never live in Seattle or somewhere like that. If I go 2 days with no sun I start to freak out. Right now it's just a little inconvenient since there's so much to do. We were going to try to brand this weekend, but now everything is covered in water or 12,000 feet of mud.

    We have a few more foals on the ground. Sorry, no good pics yet. The wild horses pose better for me than those cranky mommies. All in good time I guess. lol. We also have about 10 stud colts to geld. Again with the muddy corrals, not going to happen soon. I miss having so many horses in my back yard. We moved the bulls out, along with a few horses since the stock water pond dried up. We still have last year's babies and a couple saddle horses handy, but it seems a bit empty around here.

    As most of you know by now, we were out of town for a while for my uncle's funeral. It was a quick trip with many hours in the car. Our truck is in the shop, so we had to take a rental. Turns out hitting a bovine at 10 miles an hour can still do $7,000 in damage to the truck, while said bovine walks off chewing a cud. My hands are clean on that one, talk to The Cowboy. hahahaha At any rate, the rental is the nicest vehicle my butt has sat in, in quite some time. Although the buttons on the steering wheel are the DEVIL. Not only does The Cowboy have control of the car, but also the radio. Yes, it's annoying beyond belief.

    So other than being super tired, and playing catch-up on just about everything, all is well here. Here's a few pics of the happier festivities that have been happening around here.

Easter

 

Munchkin Turns 3!

 

They're Here!(otherwise known as Baby Kickens)

 

 

 

Finishing the Coup(aka the Kicken House)

 

Cookies

    I was going through some pictures today, when I came across these. It's a very good representation of why 2 year olds don't have cooking shows.

How to Create a Fabulous Cookie     

                  starring the Munchkin.....

First you need to gain access to the counter tops, by saying, "helpa Momma cook".

Then proceed to mix your dry ingredients....

 

Start by measuring out your flour, till you've almost reached the bottom of the jar.

 

Take special care to measure properly and level off your measuring cup.

 

 

 

Don't forget to add various spices that might be on the counter as well. Then continue with flour as long as you can, until Mommy starts to notice where her flour is ending up. 

 

Stir well in preparation for wet ingredients.

 

 

This is how your mixture should look (and the empty salt &pepper shaker) if you followed all the steps correctly.

 

Since Mommy won't give you any water, make sure to rub flour everywhere, even into your clothes. Then give an innocent face.

 

 

 

Maybe next time we'll cover the wet ingredients.

Thanks for tuning in to the Ranch's Cooking with the Munchkin Show!

Silent Saturday

I've heard of "Wordless Wednesdays", but how about a "Silent Saturday"? Ok well, maybe a Semi-Silent Saturday since I'm talking, or typeing, or whatever. I think it's the nature of the Estrogen Beast, I can't be fully silent. Yes, I do talk to myself out loud no matter if someone is around or not, just in case you were wondering. Anyhoo....

These were taken at our house, as the sun was rising, and the Cowboy was moving the herd to the shipping corrals.

Peaceful Morning

 

Canine Companion

 

 

Skitem Up

 

 

 These were taken on our "day off", when we went on the Lander Loop Road.

Winter Preparations

 

Munchkin Fishing  (there's no peace since she learned to reel it in)

 

Munchkin Mad (because we weren't fishing, I fear she's alot like me)

 

On our way home...

 

Cool Waters

 

 

Heaven Help Us

Heaven Help Us……

 

    It’s been a week since the Cowboy had a chew. I’m not going to lie; I’ve wanted to punch him in the face every single one of those days. I love my husband very much and I’m very proud of him for doing this. That being said, I just want to see what happens when I take a cast iron skillet to the back of his head. He’s been running around just about every waking hour with a wad of Copenhagen Snuff in his lip for about 15 years now. Imagine the level of addiction.

    I don’t really know what I expected, but I don’t think I imagined the level of crankiness. It really didn’t help that until he got his medicine lined out, the doctor told him to lay low. He was still checking on things and irrigating, but really wasn’t up to snuff to do much else. In case you don’t have a Cowboy around your house, if they aren’t busy doing something, they are busy driving you nuts. It’s just not in their nature to sit in the house for long, or sit anywhere for that matter. So add that on top of the nicotine fits and you can see why I need a vacation.

 

Heaven Help Us…

   

    We woke up on Saturday to a swimming pool in our hall way. When you stumble towards the bathroom first thing in the morning and you step onto squishy, cold and wet carpet, that’s a bit of a shock! The hot water heater sprung a leak. Of course things like this always happen over the weekend, so you have to wait till Monday.

    The good news is that the plumber guy is going to put a shut off valve on the new one. Since the old one doesn’t have one, we had to shut off the water to the whole house. Of course, I was doing my usual routine of asking the Cowboy a thousand questions to try to get around not having water. None of my angles worked. The whole bottom of the tank had rusted out. So, sometime today all of it should be resolved, hopefully.

 

Heaven Help Us…

 

    Breaking out in hives is never fun for anyone. When your horse breaks out in hives they can’t exactly tell you what happened. I’ve seen it twice before, but never this bad. Our poor Blue Mare, was swollen up, itchy, and dotted all over. Ironically, I’ve only seen it in mares. Pretty sure that means absolutely nothing at all, just funny.

    “Boo”, as the munchkin calls her, had giant welts on her from head to toe. Her eyes were swollen and puffy, her ears were swollen, and all around her mouth was lumpy and swollen. She looked like she’d been 10 rounds with Cassius Clay. Muhammad Ali. You know the “float like a butterfly, sing like a bee” guy? Only this time it really might have been a bee sting that was the culprit.

    It just so happens that the Boss Man is a Veterinarian, so he came to take a look at her. Handy, I know! So one horse sized shot of benadryl later, she’s doing well. She does however have an attitude about the fact that she’s close to the house and by herself, but she’ll have to put her big girl pants on and get over it. She needs another shot today and then she can have her freedom again.

 

Heaven Help Us…

 

    We all went outside yesterday evening to start the grill to cook supper. That’s when my Punkin Head announced, “Horse ride!” Oh man, I thought her days of wanting to just hop on a horse would start next summer. You know when she’s all grown up at the ripe old age of 3, not now at 2! So I caught my old man Tango and threw her on. Since we were waiting on the grill, the Cowboy went ahead and saddled him up for her. I know she’s little, but daddy’s ranch saddle just makes her seem so tiny. I looped the halter around and gave her the “reins”. She thought she was big stuff, holding on to the saddle and the reins all at once. Luckily, Tango follows a person around when a little on is on board. So I started walking around with Tango and Punkin in tow. Then Tango started to go off on his own. Well, he was just being a good pony, since my daughter was doing the driving.  

    Heart attack #1— watching your 2 year old child turn the horse away from you and head off in a different directions while kicking her bare feet and in between tongue clucks, giggles. Daddy went and got a bridle after that.

    Heart attack #2--- watching your 2 year old child turn the horse in several circles that would make a barrel racer proud all the while praying she stays in the center.

    Heart attack #3--- watching your 2 year old child ignore her father’s commands to pull back and tell the horse “whoa”. She looks over at me and giggles for a few more steps, then finally gives in and stops.

 

  Heaven Help Us…the other issues will soon pass, this fearless little girl on a horse is going to be around for quite some time!  

 

 

Punkin's First Ride

    I'm itching to get on my pony (yes I mean horse, it's just a thing between the Cowboy and I, we say pony, don't ask). My old man didn't winter so well this year, so I was getting a little worried about how soon I'd be able to ride again. He's been on some good green grass, so now he's fat, sassy and slicked off. He's the one that I can ride while packing my Punkin Head. She likes to sit bareback and be led around, but isn't very keen on a saddle yet. That's just fine with me, since she doesn't have much for balance yet. Next year though will be a different story I'm sure. She screams bloody murder when you take her off her horse, you'd think we just killed her. Might be time to start looking at kid's saddles for next year.

    Other than when I was preggo with her, he first ride was with me when she was a month old. That was a bit of a nervous ride for me. The Cowboy was out of town, helping build some fence (again). My ponies thought it would be a great idea to find a hole in the fence (courtesy of the Grey Horse) and head to the neighbors house 2 miles away. Great, just great. So here I am by myself, with baby, needing to catch 4 horses. Just another day in the life.

    I gathered up halters, a saddle etc, a bucket, and the baby. Loaded up in the car aka "The Green Machine" (it was a geo metro haha), we set out for the neighbors to the west of us. I pulled up to the scene of the crime, well at least the culprits. I caught my old man Tango, pulled the saddle from the hatchback, and tied him to the side mirror. I then went to catching the outlaws. The neighbor lady (who was 80-something)was nice enough to help hold all the monsters while I got the baby ready. I quickly had her all slinged up in her "moby" which is a wrap thingy that snuggles them close in a little cocoon--very handy! 

    So now I'm in the saddle, cocoon in place, and horses in hand. It's a very good thing my horses have been ponied before. It's an extremely good thing that Tango works off your legs and feet since I didn't have that many hands free. I was a little nervous I'll admit. Seems like now that I'm a mom, I can see all the wrecks coming a mile away, even if they never actually happen. It was probably the longest 2 miles of my life! I don't think Punkin Head even opened her eyes once. 

We made it safely home, no major problems. I think I had already threatened my horses enough with my new found "mom voice", that they knew not to pull anything stupid. Now that the horses were safe in a different pasture, I had to go get the car. A different neighbor saw my car and stopped to help bring it back to the house. What a morning! I needed a nap, but then Punkin Head woke up. Perfect timing.   

Punkin Head

    With Mother's Day approaching and today being my daughter's birthday, I thought I'd tell you my story of the beginning of motherhood. I spent my very first Mother's Day in the NICU in Scottsbluff, Nebraska. Not exactly how I imagined it. I was supposed to still be pregnant during Mother's Day. I guess my impatient child had other plans in mind.

    Some women might be offended when their husband asks the doctor, "So I should just treat her like a 1st calf heifer, right doc?" If you are in the cattle business however, you take it with a grain of salt. It's just his way of trying to relate. He knows cows in labor, not people. I still had to laugh though. How strange that must sound! I'm sure none of my sister's ever had heifers brought up at an O.B. appointment!!!!

   It took us about 3 years to even get pregnant, due to my endometriosis. We'd been waiting some time for this pregnancy journey to happen. Cowboy always said, "If you were a cow, I would have culled you by now!". Now I was 8 months pregnant, huge, but still feeling pretty good. I started having contractions one evening while Cowboy was gone roping. "Somebody", I'll not mention who, didn't have his cell phone turned on. The contractions just weren't going away, no matter what I did, so I was gathering up some stuff and leaving a note, when Cowboy walked through the door. So away we went.

    False alarm, well it was real contractions, but we got them stopped. I was 5 weeks away from my due date after all. A couple days later, I had my baby shower. I was told by numerous people, "You're not going to make it to your due date hunny." I was having contractions all that week, so I was starting to believe all the old ladies advice.

    On Monday, May 5, we went to a friends house for dinner. We grilled, we laughed and had a great time, all the while I was contracting. We arrived home at 10pm, got ready for bed, and the Cowboy fell fast asleep. I tossed and turned for a while (ladies you know what I mean, big belly=no sleep) then I said, "What the?". Cowboy groaned a response. I then informed him I thought my water broke. A panic came over my calm Cowboy. "Either you did or you didn't, how can you not know?"

    A little bit later, we were loaded up and headed to the hospital. My "plan" was to stay at home as long as possible, but that went out the window since I was 4 weeks and one day early. After being checked in, my water had indeed broke. I walked the halls most the night, trying to absorb all that was happening. The Cowboy in true testosterone style, slept like a lazy bull whose job was done.

    I was transfered in the early morning to Scottsbluff, since I was now a "high-risk" delivery and there wasn't a NICU in the current hospital. I rode in a bumpy ambulance, strapped down to the stupid bed for a half an hour on my back. Annoyed was not the word I used, especially since they wouldn't even stop at McDonald's. In the meantime, my Cowboy was in tow, thinking he was cool following an ambulance and speeding. My mom and sister had drove up in the night from Colorado and they went to the house to get some stuff. We didn't even grab a hospital bag when we left, heck I didn't even have one packed!

    The next 15 hours went by slow. Laboring with my Cowboy helping (I guess he just needed some sleep, because after that he was great), not making any progress. Conceding to an epidural that didn't work since I was maxed out on the devil drug pitocin, was followed by more laboring. Finally over 24 hours had passed and not enough progress, so I was sent for emergency C-section. I was so exhausted that I was in and out when the Cowboy showed up in his fancy scrubs. He looked like all the rest of the blue people running around the room, till I saw his eyes. He was so worried I'd fall asleep and not wake up. In no time they had our baby girl out and crying. I gave her a kiss and she was handed to her Daddy. He was told by the nurse to follow her to the NICU so they could do all the tests and such. He hesitated. He didn't know it was possible for him to hold her and walk through a room of people at the same time. May 6, Baby Girl, 18 3/4 inches long, 6#11oz, 10 fingers, 10 toes  and a full head of hair.

    Almost 2 days went by, till the doctor came in and told me that they needed to take her and put her in the NICU. One minute she was cuddling on my chest, and the next she was gone. The Cowboy had gone home to take care of horses etc and was coming back in the morning to get us. I was sobbing so uncontrollably I had to get the nurse to tell him what was going on. He came right away. I was discharged without my baby. I had a full diaper bag, flowers, and an empty car seat. I was an emotional wreck.

    The next week was spent going to and from the NICU. I felt guilty if I didn't make it to every feeding, even if it was through a tube. Sometimes we stayed the whole time, from one feeding till the next. Neighbors helped out with the livestock and pets, which was priceless, so we could spend more time with our Punkin Head. When we finally brought her home, she still needed oxygen. So now we said we had a "wireless" baby, just not a tubeless one. Another week went by till she could get off the oxygen.

    It was a trying time. I can't even imagine the parents that have to do it for months on end. You couldn't even tell it by looking at her now, 2 years later. She's Daddy's girl and Momma's shadow. She's never been sick more than a couple days, and never been in the hospital since. When I count the blessings in my life, she's the first.

 

  Punkin Heads Album